Dating Someone with HIV

It may not be unusual for anyone to fall for someone with HIV or dating someone with HIV. Every HIV positive patient has a right to lead a normal life. In fact, it is more desirable if the society can accept a HIV patient.

Insecurities and problems faced by your partner if you are dating someone with HIV:

• They are scared to disclose their HIV status.
• If you started the relationship without knowing about his HIV status and came to know about it recently then he will be very insecure about rejection
• They fear to be stereotyped by you, which he generally faces by the society

However, it is very essential to take certain precautions if you are dating someone with HIV:

1. Have a good discussion about his HIV stage and the future of your relationship
2. Have safe sex
3. In several cases, HIV patients suffer from psychological turbulences, disturbances and other psycho neurotic problems. Many a times, they are prone to committing anti-social activities like drug abuse and are promiscuous. Be sure about his mental stability, and how he behaves with others.
4. Be sure about his activities in your absence.

Your responsibilities if you are dating with HIV positive person:

For your own precaution, if you suspect any highly risky behavior in your partner, then go for a test. The chances are, he would himself not discuss his HIV status in fear of rejection. So be mature while asking him about his status. Take him for a test if he is also unsure about his disease. Indulge in safe sexual activities till then, and continue doing so till he is diagnosed as HIV negative. Remember just one diagnostic test is not enough. Ask him to go for it at least once in every fortnight.

If by any chance if he is diagnosed as HIV positive then keep the following things in mind:

1. Be compassionate towards him. He might face many social pressures and stigmatizations. You should lend him the support he is looking for
2. Stop him from taking drugs (if he is addicted to it).
3. If you see any abnormalities in his social outlook and behavior with others, help him with warmth and understanding
4. Take professional help, if required
5. Be sure that he goes for regular check ups, and takes his medicines on time.
6. Do not ever taunt him on his HIV status or any of his weaknesses related to his disease. This will increase his insecurity which may not be good for the relationship
7. Do not accuse him about his past mistakes that culminated into the disease
8. Assure him that you want to give him a good, healthy and a secure life
9. Involve him in other positive activities like art of living, sports, art, theatre or counseling sessions
10. Know your HIV status from time to time.
11. Provide him with all the emotional supports that he needs and be matured in handling the relationship, if you are dating someone with HIV.

It is not a crime if you are dating someone with HIV. However, you will face a lot of social pressure and at times certain problems from your partners, like insecurity and mistrust, that do not exists in a normal relationship. You have to be quite matured in handling your partner and mentally strong to face the cynicism of the society. Act responsibly and be very clear about the future of your relationship and the commitment to your partner, right from the very beginning, if you are dating someone who is HIV positive.